Aerial View:

• Intro thoughts

• Mindful Minute: Rediscovering the Inner Boy: Lessons from a Weekend with 20 Mindful Men

• Conscious Consumer: Tallow Twins Magnesium Balm

• Quote of the week

• 3 key questions to reflect on

Welcome back fellas, it feels really good to be writing this as we get closer to closing out month 1 of the year. In my world, 2025 started off like a marathon, but at a sprinter’s pace. Not healthy, and not sustainable. Good news, I am finally snapping back into lion mode, in which I fully embody the sprint, rest, repeat mentality. Way more my style and far more effective (and sustainable.)

As I write this, I am coming off of an incredible weekend, my first full weekend off since I started building my business back in August of 2022. I’ve taken time off (I’m not a robot) and I DO have the desired work/life balance I crave now, but a full weekend off without emails, updates, systems checks, etc.? This was the first one in 2.5 years. Crazy to think about, but when you are building something you’re passionate about, you don’t want to stop. Ever. (Yes, this can cause burnout, as we’ve discussed)

Anyway, today’s edition is all about my experience last weekend at a men’s group retreat I went to. Let’s get into it.

Mindful Minute: Rediscovering the Inner Boy: Lessons from a Weekend with 20 Mindful Men

First of all,  I want to preface this by highlighting the fact that I work with a coach. His name is Graham. I’ve been working with Graham for about a year and a half now, and while we work on quite a lot together, most of the work we do focuses on the internal. This work is what inspired me to start and share The Mindful Man.

What they don’t tell you about starting a business is that if you’re a 26 year old kid with no real operating experience, and you want the business to grow incredibly fast, then the person running the business will need to grow even faster to stay out in front of the wave and sustain the pace.

Basically, the rapid growth rate of my business required me to evolve significantly faster than the natural pace- in order to keep the business alive. The result? Something I call the lag effect.

The lag effect - physically and mentally operating at a new, expanded pace, but not having the emotional ability required to do so in sync yet (lagging behind.)

Think of it like an old phone trying to operate with the newest update. New software requires new hardware, and vice versa. I had to become who the business needed me to become, and it happened really fast. Uncomfortably fast. This brought a lot of growing pains that led me to looking for someone to help me through them. Enter Graham.

Aside from coaching young, hungry, high performers, Graham also runs a men’s group where other similar men come together on calls and in person for meetups, events, and retreats. We had one in my backyard here in South FL last weekend, and it was my first time attending one.

There were about 20 or so of us, from all walks of life- brought together with one shared goal: empowerment.

It’s really hard to be someone working relentlessly towards massive goals. It’s isolating, requires extreme sacrifice, and can make you feel like you’re losing your mind at times. Ambition comes at a price. Speaking from experience, it’s tough to find other guys in the same boat right away. Again, it is VERY isolating.

That’s why last weekend was so powerful. We had 20 guys who shared this common golden thread. When you are able to find and connect with other guys who are actually IN the arena, it is invigorating, and can lead to incredible outcomes.

Have you ever felt like a piece of your identity has been missing after you stepped away from team sports, group activities, or tribal situations (fraternities, sports teams, clubs, etc.)? Ever stopped to think about how significant of a role these groups play in our lives?

I’ve been reflecting on how we often overlook the impact these bonds have on us in the moment, and don’t recognize their impact until we no longer have them in our lives. We realize their true power through their absence. This results in feelings of loneliness, aimlessness, and internal uncertainty. The bottom line is that these groups give us a sense of belonging that we thrive on. This feeling makes us better all around.

I was reminded of this last weekend.

So, what did we do on this retreat weekend with 20 guys of all ages?

We lived in the moment. We unplugged, connected , made music, played games, grilled meat, went to the beach, did breath-work sessions, sound healing, and more. We had deep meaningful conversations about the highs and lows of each of our lives, and showed one another that while both our successes and struggles may be unique to each of us, we do not have to be alone through them. We slowed down and took a break from our rapid-fire lives and unplugged from the digital world we are all so tightly wrapped into. 

When was the last time you just shot the shit with the fellas for 3 days in a row with no agenda? For me, it hasn’t been since college. This time around, instead of boozing and retreating from our lives, we hydrated, ate nourishing foods, did activities, and fostered real productive healing conversations, embracing our struggles instead of running from them. Together. It’s hard to put into words how powerful this was.

Do you remember what it was like to be a boy? To be fearless, care-free, and always present with your buddies? As we get older, it’s easy to grow away from the boy inside of each of us. He’s in there, and he needs attention. Carving time out to disconnect from the world and tap back into your inner child should be looked at as a required weekly task for everyone. We become adults, and we take on responsibilities, I know. But must we say goodbye to the things that make us feel like kids again? I say no. I say we need MORE of those things, and more often. Last weekend enabled me to tap back into the boy inside, while confronting the struggles that are present in the man’s life. A beautiful duality.

The retreat was incredible in a lot of ways, and I could go on and on about it, but here are my main takeaways:

I am not alone in adversity. We all experience it, and we need to lean on each other to get through it.

Men feel incredibly deeply too, we’ve just been conditioned to stifle those feelings instead of letting them flow through. This causes all sorts of emotional damming that result in eventual explosions/overflows. We can get out ahead of this cycle by communicating and letting other people in.

As men, we have a responsibility to be at our best as often as possible, which means doing whatever it takes. That includes confronting your fears, emotions, and demons. That will look different for everyone, but it usually starts with an intentional look in the mirror followed by an honest conversation with yourself. 

We need time with the fellas. We’re social creatures that thrive in packs. Find your pack, it’s an easy way to immediately improve your confidence, happiness, and life. Isolation is a depressant.

We must question ourselves on our initial programmed responses to things we typically write off. If you’re reading this and thinking you’re above working with a coach, sharing your feelings, or getting together with a group of men to connect and be present, you may need to check yourself. Growth starts by questioning your internal dialogue. And no, we didn’t gather round and sing Kumbaya. (It was Mr. Brightside.)

Imposter syndrome is real and usually our self-talk is entirely unfair. Notice how you praise others and give advice/feedback externally. But watch how you talk to yourself differently. If you catch yourself here, ask yourself “If my best friend were in my shoes, how would I speak to him/her?” Talk to yourself that way. Give yourself some grace. You deserve it.

Simplicity yields the answers. We typically can find all we need in simplicity. The simple things usually bring us the most joy. Football on the beach, making music with friends, meditation/breath-work sessions, great food and deep conversation. Struggling with your next step? Slow down, simplify, and let the answer find you.

We MUST find our personal why. Not the worldly why, not the societal contribution why, but your own selfish personal why. What is it that you REALLY want for YOU, in your OWN life? If you don’t have clarity on this, you’ll be pushing forward with one hand tied behind your back. The bigger why is important, of course, but your personal why MUST be taken into account at all times. It’s your true north star. Why am I really doing all of this? For what? Find it.

That’s all I’ve got for today guys, if you get the chance to connect with other like-minded guys anytime soon, take it. If not, seek it out. Find a way to make it happen. It makes a huge difference. We must go against the grain and come together to combat the men’s mental health crisis. Strength is found together, not alone. Much love.

Conscious Consumer

Quote of the week

This quote obviously was spoken through the lens of a baseball team. But theres a lesson here that’s applicable to the bigger picture. In the world of ambitious high performers that we live in, it’s easy to feel and operate alone. And while we may be alone in the tactical, we can choose not to be alone elsewhere. We can surround ourselves with others playing the game, building different, meaningful lives, and although our work itself may not overlap, the journey is shared. Pulling others on the path closer to you and leaning on one another makes each member of the team better, and thus, the entire “club” too.

Rise and Reflect - 3 Questions to Inspire Impactful Action and Critical Reflection

1. Do I have a group of like-minded guys I frequently spend time with? How can I find one?

2. What role did groups/teams/tribes play in my upbringing? Have I ever stopped to think about how much those things benefitted me/played a role in my identity?

3. Am I communicating externally enough? Do I stifle my emotions and retreat or do I confront them and share how I feel with someone/others?

My Ask of You

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Thank you for being here.

Sails up, eyes open.

Until next time,
Dan Baird